Monday, January 31, 2011

My New Year’s Resolutions at End of January

As part of my personal change strategy, I decided to set specific goals for 2011 to reflect the positive changes I want to have in my life.  Here are my goals and what I have done or plan to do to achieve them.
·         Morning Walks – To be upfront, daily walks are not new.  I’ve been walking mornings throughout the year but believe me, it’s still difficult to hop out of bed, bundle up during the winter months and be out of the house by 6:30 to walk for 30 to 45 minutes but I do it.
·         Volunteer – Something I’ve done before and wanted to do again. The last time I volunteered (as a home visitor), my girls were still living at home so now that I am an empty nester, why am I not giving freely of my time?  In December, I contacted a food bank and on January 14, started my first shift sorting donations and stacking shelves, something I will be doing weekly. 
·         Once a Month Family  Sunday Dinners – My girls and sons-in-law visit on a regular basis not necessarily at the same time. We are all busy but I wanted us to get together once a month for a nice meal, prepared by me, our usual loud conversations, relaxation and fun.  We settled on the third Sunday of each month. Flexibility is built in; if someone can’t make it, no stress.  We had our first dinner on January 16; a hearty beef stew, green peas and rice, Brussels sprouts, a nice red wine and chocolate cake. A good time was had by all and they are already requesting favourite meals. Off topic a little. I’ve asked the girls to get together at my home to go through the boxes of photos we’ve been accumulating. This will be a time for them to reminisce and just be with each other.
·         Learn Father’s Family History – I know most of my mother’s family history, much of it from relatives and entries in a family journal that is over 100 years old. Not so much on my father’s side so I created a list of questions for my father’s last remaining sibling, Aunt Millie.   Aunt Millie is quite a character and to hear my father tell it, when I was a child, she was known as the sibling who spoke her mind, something many women were not known for back in the day.  She and I have had conversations about the family and what it was like when she was growing up but I had specific questions and decided to put them together and ask Millie to provide the answers.  I called my aunt to let her know what I was about to request and sent off the package with a returned envelope.  My girls are excited to see Millie’s responses and to learn a bit more of their history. This little exercise also made us think about taking a trip to see Aunt Millie. You know, this is something we all can do before the links to our past are no more. 
·         Maintain my Home – Why wait until spring to tackle major house cleaning jobs? My home is not messy by any stretch of the imagination but we all know it doesn’t take much for clutter to form.  Although I receive most bills electronically, I still get a good amount of mail the old fashion way so I try to not let them pile up.  Junk mail and bills that have been paid are shredded and flyers, restaurant menus, etc. are placed in the recycling bin. Once upon a time I kept these items telling myself I will use them at some point. Well, that rarely happened because I often forgot what was in those piles. I no longer keep magazines after I’ve read them, I just recycle them along with my daily paper.  Still working on the catalogues, I tend to hang onto those. Closets and cupboards are the big jobs I have to do. So far I’ve organized the bottom of one closet and by doing a little each week, I should be done with the rest in no time. Come spring, the only major cleaning job will be my windows.
·         Socialize with Girlfriends – Many of the women I know are without a partner and many of us tend to socialize with our kids or a few friends. I have decided that I will organize outings for the women in my social circle and they in turn can invite other women to join us.  This actually was started in November when three of us went to a political debate; four of us went to a dinner theatre and the following week to a Christmas Tree Lighting ceremony. Not large numbers but a start. This year I will follow through with plans for us to go to festivals, picnics and other outings.
·         Meet a Nice Man for Companionship – This is most definitely a goal so it is on my list. I am no longer leaving something so important to chance.  Remember, listing your goals help you focus on achieving them.  I made a list of what I want in this person as I am no longer willing to get involved in a relationship that is not working for me. Why waste his time and mine?  Expectations are high hereJ 
·         Say Yes More Often – I enjoy solitary activities so I recognize my need to step outside my comfort zone and say yes to more invitations. This ties in nicely with wanting to socialize more with girlfriends.
·         Travel at Least Twice - For business and pleasure.
·         Grow my Business – The last item on this list but not the least. After a setback with a website designer, I had to set about finding someone to complete my site.  I will draw on my skills and knowledge to make it all come together. Expecting great things this year.
When called to a meeting, we expect an agenda to keep track of what is to be discussed.  On a road trip, we follow a map. Should our lives be any different? Listing what we wish to accomplish helps us focus on our goals. Referring to the list on a regular basis keeps us on track and allows us to tweak it as necessary.  In my opinion, if we map out our resolutions in the same manner, I believe we will be more successful in accomplishing them.

Will keep you posted.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

I Got a New Attitude

Life is what you make it; a cliché perhaps but also a simple truth.

I’ve changed my outlook on life. As Patti LaBelle sang, “I got a new attitude.”  

This new me was a long time coming. I made some changes (ending a stagnant relationship) and some changes were made for me (the loss of my job).

I am no longer responsible for three little girls. My daughters are now adults pursuing careers and living their lives away from the family home.  What better time to work on my attitude, goals and expectations? What better time for change?

Sometimes in this coin toss of a life we call “heads” and get lucky; sometimes we call “tails” and come up “heads”. It may all work as planned or maybe not. So we learn and keep trying.
 
Will keep you posted.