Alone But Not Lonely

Here we are on the cusp of May; almost five months into the year and no sign of the nice man I am to meet.  Yup, he is one of my resolutions for this year; meet a nice man for companionship.  Actually, he was one of my goals last year as well. So far, there’s no sign of him. He sure is elusive.

Where are the older men? They can’t all be living like hermits. Are they all in relationships?  Have they tried the dating scene and given up? Have they migrated to younger women? Well, some of them have. I seldom see older men on their own. You can guaranty if there’s an older man pushing a grocery cart or walking around a store, his partner is not far off.

I complain about not meeting anyone, but truth be told, I am not looking that hard. Actually, I am not looking at all. If it happens, so be it. I have walked the married/in a relationship road with less than stellar results. I have found myself putting up with shoddy behaviour and wondered why, since outside my marriage when my girls were little, I was never financially dependent on anyone. It was not like I was fulfilling my dreams of travel with any of them, or dinners, theatre, tours. No, these relationships were basic; dinner, movie, dance and a picnic once a year. Of course, in the beginning there would be gifts and more movies and dinners. Then the comments would start about how much they enjoy just having a home-cooked meal and just hanging out at home. How relaxing it is to just stay in.  How going out on a holiday Monday is difficult because of work on Tuesday which just left Saturday as an OK day. Going out would be reduced further to the bare minimum to tamp down on my complaints of “You don’t take me anywhere.”

Mingy, My Adorable Companion

Marriage is not in my future.  Neither is sharing my home with anyone. I am at a place in my life where having a companion for social activities is all I require. So what type of man would fit the bill? Here is what I wrote on the subject on December 31, 2011:

So if you are independent, unattached, financially responsible, care about your relatives and pets; date women close to your age, love hanging out, movies, theatre, day trips, travel and giving back; if you look fairly decent, take care of yourself, have a live and let live attitude and a sense of humour; if you keep abreast of what’s going on in the world and at least try to keep up with technology; if you are not set in your ways and just waiting for death, maybe we’ll meet sooner than later.

Knowing what I want from a relationship (even one that is yet to materialize) is half the battle. Learning from my mistakes makes it easier to be upfront in a new relationship. I won’t settle for less again even if it means being alone but definitely not lonely especially with Mingy (pictured) to keep me company.

Will keep you posted.